Due to a request by my loving husband to write a more cheerful post, I decided to post this list I made a few years ago when Nate and I weren't ready to have children yet, but I had friends who were starting to get pregnant and they were complaining about it. (no offense but yeah you totally were!) This list is definitely on the graphic side, so if you get queasy easily or don't want to read anything disgusting I wouldn't recommend reading any further! It is a helpful reminder though, whenever I'm feeling jealous of all the girls at my church who get to experience pregnancy, the things they have to go through that I will never have to deal with or worry about.
*One more thing to say: I didn't make up this list I just wrote it down, so I'm not even sure what everything on this list is, or how accurate it is.
The Reasons NOT to Get Pregnant: (in no particular order)
1-morning sickness all the time
2-implantation of the egg
3-round ligament pain
4-stuff coming out of you all the time
5-water breaking
6-mucus plug
7-nurse pulling on your head while you push
8-placenta birth
9-in labor for numerous hours
10-bleeding for 4 weeks after birth
11-huge pads to wear (and special paper panties)
12-boobs leaking
13-uterus infection from placenta detaching
14-breast infection from nursing
15-explosive diarrhea going everywhere(don't ask me...I just wrote it down!)
16-up at all hours of the night
17-forced to give up caffeine
That's all I have...anyone else have anything to add?
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5 comments:
What about those stitches I sometimes hear about? I'm laughing about the mucus plug. A friend's FB status the other day was, "My mucus plug fell out!" and I just about died.
I like this post!
Bahahaha, that sounds about right! I'm pretty sure I remember when you wrote several of these down... :) In response to Trisha's previous comment, I cannot believe someone would post that on FB!! haha Thanks for the pleasant reminders. ;)
So...for those of us who haven't been (are never going to be) pregnant, what the heck is a mucus plug and why does it fall out?!?
I remember when you were making this list too. :) I especially remember the night that Emily showed you the "special panties"! ;)
I obviously haven't had kids and being the curious young woman I am, I googled "mucus plug." Trust me, Face. This is NOT something you want to do. THERE ARE PICTURES and you WILL vomit.
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